Ayesha Khan unveils the transition from the conventional Bengali woman to her contemporary counterpart. Every woman holds an enigma of beauty, beauty much deeper than her skin, which lies deep in her mind.
Kolkata, the city of ethics and culture cannot be compared to any state in India. The Kolkatan culture depicts the authentic concept of ‘Indian Women’, defining their impeccable beauty, devotion and immense power. In this new age of changes, Kolkata has also witnessed mass reformation, the contemporary Bengali women depicting one of the major transformations.
Bengali women have forever been pictured as a subtle woman of sublime beauty, draped in a white ‘Dhakai’ saree with red border, her garlanded hair, vermillion on her forehead and, of course, the conch-shell bangles.
That, however, was true 10-15 years ago. Women of then had an unusually supportive approach towards each and every thing. They were homely, secured and were provided with the natural elements to grow. A tranquil composure, grace, artistic sense and discipline were intrinisic of a Bengali woman. Despite the lack of educational facilities, they grew up with a sense of art and natural instincts. The art of ‘Alpona’, preparation of ‘payesh’ and offering ‘ashirbaad’ on birthdays, ‘boron’ etc made them exquisitive and elegant. ‘Baro masher taero porbon’ , stated that theywere ritualistic.
That, however, was true 10-15 years ago. Changing Kolkata has altered this concept along with it too. Today, wearing of the traditional attire is only an occasional matter. The artistic essence of Bengali women is perpetually decreasing. Cakes replaces ‘payesh’, ‘ashirbaad’ turns to Birthday parties and gifts, ‘alpona’ to decorations and last but not the least, Bengali food to sandwiches and chips. The reason behind these changes occurring is the change in the line of thought by Bengali women.
As the popular dancer Smt. Amala Shankar (91) quoted, “When the British came to India, the upper class women started adopting their ways and fashion. They wore blouses with sarees that changed their appearance slightly. In our time, when a bride was to be chosen, she was first asked towalk in front of the groom’s family. That expressed the personality and regality of the woman. Her beauty and dignity was determined by the way she presented herself.”
These method are no more seen in the modern women. They would rather go to a restaurant with the to-begroom, chat, dine and then make their decision. Recalling a moment from her childhood, she says, “Every woman is special. In the village where I was born, even we used to celebrate Mother’s Day, but in a completely different way. Any woman whose name coincided with one’s mother’s became a pseudo-mother, irrespective of the caste, for one year.” Born in a small village of bengal in a mudhouse, though, now considered as the citizen of the world’, Smt Amala Shankar is proud to be a ‘woman’.
Women of the previous generations were brought up with high moral orders of life and taught to be humane and compassionate. Back then, making a career was no compulsion, rather performing one’s sole duties was plenty. Nevertheless, the changed notion of women today states that a daughter must do what she wants in order to fulfill her dreams. Mamata Shankar, daughter of Smt. Amala Shankar, a great dancer and actress says, “I am not satisfied with the mall culture. In Kolkata, several malls have come up, where you’d see youngsters ‘hanging out’ day in and day out. Women – forever attracted to dresses and jewellery – it is then that the futile hunger for brands grows.” Previously women used to go to the ‘bazaar’ and buy things, but today, in the emerging mall and retail market culture, they now desire to go to malls even for minor things and end up spending doubly. She adds, “The vigor of Bengali culture is descending. Mothers today encourage their children to go to parties with friends, discotheques, night outs and so on, without the essential guidelines.”
Transformation happens as a whole, encompassing this. The thinking and the ideas of the Bengali Women also changed. Mamata Shankar recollected, “I remember when we were young, we went to restaurants on rare and very special occasions. We used go with our whole family, dress up in our best attires and feel good about it. Those incidents were exceptional and unforgettable.” In today’s changing times, eating out is too commonplace for an occassion in a Bengali woman’s lifestyle.
Views on fashion have also changed. For Bengali women, gold jewellery, traditional sarees and the conch-shell bangles are best suited, but the conventional ‘dhakai’ saree has been wrapped by designer sarees, kanjivaram to chiffon or crape, gold jewellery to junk ones, ‘aalta’ in hand by ‘mehendi’ and Conch-shell bangles to new plastic or wooden bangles. They are now more attracted towards brands and boutique wear.
Inspite of this gripping transformation age, there are but a few things that Bengali women have kept alive, even today. The rituals such as performing several pujos, the process of marriage, dressing up in sarees during Durga Pujas, and the vermillion on their forehead, still persist.
The transition of Bengali women has yet not been accepted by the Bengali Community. However, we must embrace the fact that change is inevitable, if not the change itself.
